With less than a week before tee time, the 2010 Burger Stag Tournament field has been set. Players will arrive in Pinetop Thursday morning for a practice round before the pressure mounts Friday in the opening round. The three day event, which was cut short in 2008 due to bad weather, should be full of hacking, duffing, yanking, chilli dipping, and three jacking.
Returning this year are the disputed champions Randy and Dale, who cashed in on Sunday's rainout to win the coveted "Nordstrom's Trash Can Cup".
Recently wed and recently half Southern Californian, Gary has been on a cleanse diet and Bikram Yoga kick, which he claims will help him control downhill puts telepathically. He is paired with Stag newcomer Reid who may represent a liability. Like most recent college grads, Reid is expected to drink excessively and sleep through the weekend. As usual Bob and John enter as longshots unless tournament officials make every hole "the bucket cup". Their time tested strategy is a rope-a-dope they use against playing partners to nauseate them to death with talk about the Diamondbacks woes and East Valley politics. Finally, darkhorses Nick and Max could be contenders with their brand new approach for 2010. Newly minted 10 handicapper Nick will hit 5-iron from every tee to ensure safety, while Gorrilla-brained Max will try to reach every hole (including Par 5's) from the teebox. Unable to make time for golf since the 08 tourney, Nick has been listening to Right Said Fred and other music from the early 1990's to bring back memories of the last time he was actually "good" at golf.
Aside from the golf, which is widely expected to be "I've never played this bad in my life" terrible, a very busy agenda is in store for the weekend. Those who lose money on the course will likely be the first to demand a poker game. Chickenfoot has also been rumored as a possible diversion from discussions of "how I four-jacked number 15", but there is some question as to its overall masculinity. No matter what the circumstances, there will be copious amounts of meat consumed. Dishes will be done when somebody feels like it. No one is expected to nag anybody regarding a toilet seat improperly positioned, a wrinkled shirt, or an article of clothing left on a chair. And as has been standard since the tournament's inception, no discussion of wives or children will be tolerated.
Overall it promises to be an incredible weekend. Higlights will be posted as time allows.
